life is a tad on the confusing side of the universe as we speak.
currently, I've been yearning for change. I've tried multiple outlets with positive outcomes, but not what is calling out from within me. I feel the need for change on my life path.
to be completely honest with you, i haven't got a clue what i should do with my life nor do i know what i want to do. i don't know where i am supposed to be at (other than i know nnu is the perfect fit), who i am supposed to be with or what i am supposed to be doing. that is a lot of confusion, right?
some days i wake up in the morning and i say, "yay God building!"
other days i think, "oh no, this isn't what i want to do with my life."
the idea of social work taunts me as what i should be doing, but is it what i want to do?
well...maybe.
then, there is the art building. with questions in hand about a paper i'd written for survey of art (a thinly veiled wording for art history class), i traveled down to the basement of the white brick fine arts building. reaching the door whose glass window allows a portal to the words "department of art and design", i take a deep breathe. i walk in and feel completely different. the smell of paint lingers in the air and as i look around i see different hues, concentrated joyous faces and a sense of identity within these walls. but my question is, will i find my own identity here? sure, i love to create. without pen and paper, i could not get through most days. sure, i'm good at it. i'm left with questions yet to be answered and a little bit of emptiness inside.
i'm just a confused girl right now.
please pray.
